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FTM

Anyone who knows me, knows I have three kids and a brother. Which really means I am the oldest of five and have helped raise my siblings. Feeding, burping, bathing, soothing cries, helping with homework, discussing relationships, giving driving lessons, and filling out college applications. I have done it all. When I deployed to Afghanistan in 2008-2009, my youngest brother called me to wish me a Happy Mother’s Day. Of course he knew I did not have any biological children. He said, “oh so you go to Afghanistan and disown us?” It broke my heart. I love my kids and I would never want them to think I don’t.


Fast forward 19 years and here I am. I am a First Time Mom (FTM). The idea alone honestly scares the heck out of me. I mean think about it, there is a parasite feeding off of me for months. I am extremely fatigue and sick (nausea by day and vomiting by night). The first two months are simultaneously draining and exciting. I have had days when I have been so sick I didn’t want to get out of bed or go to work, and I love my job. I told Brian at 7 weeks pregnant that I am pretty sure I do not want to experience this again. Being sick every day is not the joyful part of being pregnant. I did not realize pregnancy was so uncomfortable, and apparently I have not reached true discomfort according to my mom, Brian’s mom, and my friend Jen. I can handle the stuff after the baby is here, but the crying (at random), the bloating, feeling full even though I didn’t eat, the fatigue….I’m over it.



However, there is an upside. When Brian places his hand on my stomach while we pray; it absolutely makes my heart melt. I know that he is going to be a great father and that he supports me (moody, whiny, and bloated LOL).  Hearing the baby’s heartbeat for the first time. The joyful part of being pregnant, is seeing the look on our parents’ and friends’ faces when we told them. Trying to decide how to announce Baby Seymour’s arrival to the masses.  The excitement of planning for his or her arrival is enough to make any FTM become a Pinterest queen (not that I needed to be pregnant for that). I have boards for EVERYTHING. 
Spending evenings choosing names, colors for the nursery, deciding whether to make our own baby food, or let Baby Seymour be a Gerber baby are all topics of discussion. Even the thought of writing this blog and what I wanted to share has been very much a part of this experience. I am looking forward to feeling him kick and move around (yes, I am claiming a boy). I am looking forward to starting family traditions, taking pregnancy photos, family photos, and making smiley face pancakes on Saturday morning. I am anxious to know what our little bundle of joy is going to look like.


I have been following along with this great app (What to Expect When You’re Expecting) and we have seen the baby grow from a pea, to a raspberry, a green olive, a prune, a lime, a large plum, and a peach.

Side bar: I think it's cute that the fetus is compared to food. LOL

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